Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
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