last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Randomize
