i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
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