Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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