Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
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