I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
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She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
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You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday