'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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