Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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