we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
no you cant smoke seaweed
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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