is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Randomize
