margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Enjoy the penises
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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