i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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