ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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