i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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