Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize