Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
