he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
