I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
