If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
