Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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