If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
