Texts From Last Night

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  (989): View more from Michigan

  i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed

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  (989): i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed http://tfl.nu/j2ib
  Replies (3) Good night (732) Bad night (1112)
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  (260): View more from Indiana

  I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.

  (260): View more from Indiana

  Sorry- wrong number! :)

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  (260): I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier. (260): Sorry- wrong number! :) http://tfl.nu/1604
  Replies (18) Good night (1526) Bad night (4896)
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  (716): View more from New York

  And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.

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  (716): And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself. http://tfl.nu/r0kt
  Replies (19) Good night (843) Bad night (3959)
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  (315): View more from New York

  Hello wreck, this is your train calling.

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  (315): Hello wreck, this is your train calling. http://tfl.nu/qxsk
  Replies (13) Good night (5682) Bad night (1296)
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  (607): View more from New York

  We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.

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  (607): We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre. http://tfl.nu/5g13
  Replies (10) Good night (2970) Bad night (1032)
• Favorite

  (819): View more from Quebec

  She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad

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  (819): She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad http://tfl.nu/9y98
  Replies (15) Good night (3160) Bad night (1269)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.

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  (508): she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking. http://tfl.nu/8dis
  Replies (15) Good night (675) Bad night (3620)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial

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  (412): No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial http://tfl.nu/kxls
  Replies (2) Good night (2632) Bad night (642)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out

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  (812): and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out http://tfl.nu/6hen
  Replies (5) Good night (2019) Bad night (593)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid

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  (715): if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid http://tfl.nu/otel
  Replies (8) Good night (1077) Bad night (1132)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time

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  (302): Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time http://tfl.nu/xi83
  Replies (0) Good night (1012) Bad night (340)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.

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  (724): She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment. http://tfl.nu/wo3z
  Replies (5) Good night (1297) Bad night (472)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.

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  (706): He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex. http://tfl.nu/pzxj
  Replies (5) Good night (1822) Bad night (360)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.

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  (937): Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills. http://tfl.nu/u4sm
  Replies (0) Good night (340) Bad night (257)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is

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  (704): I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is http://tfl.nu/xljt
  Replies (9) Good night (426) Bad night (162)

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