I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
