her vagine was all disorganized.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
