Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
