I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..