dude i'm inner monologue high
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
so let's talk penis.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
