The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
