I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
