This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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