I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
