You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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