i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
She told me I should be a condom model.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize
