remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize