I'm lost and stupid without you.
I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I have already put on my inside pants.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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