careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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