You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize