omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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