Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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