Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
