He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize