Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
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As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize