So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Randomize
