piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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