I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize