Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize