just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
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