i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Randomize
