I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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