Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
The beers last night were like the tears from god
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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