I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
